Setting New Year’s resolutions, or goals, objectives, priorities, dreams call it what you will, is all over the internet at the moment. And there is a lot of good advice out there. But it can be tough when you have a serious health issue.

You may want to do and achieve different things for yourself, your health, family, relationships, work, etc. in 2018. You have dreams too. But doing that within the reality of a health condition takes consideration. The constraints you live within are more pronounced when compared to many others. And your concerns about them are very real and important. However, it’s important to not let them consistently get in the way of you going after what you want for yourself.

So read on to find out that one thing that can get in the way of your dreams, and the three things I recommend to move beyond it.

 

What kills your New Year’s resolutions?

 

Doubt kills more dreams than failure ever well picture

Don’t let doubt get in the way of your dreams. Pic taken by B Babcock.

 

Doubt

Doubt kills more dreams than failure ever will #NewYearsResolutions #wellness #makeyourdreamshappen tell a friend

 

I came across this saying in a London restaurant and it resonated with me. Doubt is the one thing which can often prevent us from really going for something we want for ourselves or even starting to go for it. It often stops people from setting New Year’s resolutions.

Living with the impact of serious health issue, you know how fragile and precious life can be. So your dreams are especially important. Don’t let doubt get in the way of achieving them. Here are three things which helps keep doubt from taking over.

 

1. Break your New Year’s resolution into smaller steps that build on one another

 

Take into account the health constraints and any other constraints you live with. It’s ok to take small actions. Small actions can be so much more achievable. They also allow us to practice and through that strengthen our commitment to our New Year’s resolution.

Also, pace your goals as you pace your energy. It’s ok if a New Year’s resolution is spread over more than one year.

It’s great practice to break your #NewYearsResolutions into smaller goals and actions. That makes it so much more achievable #wellness #makeyourdreamshappen tell a friend

 

2. Get support

 

You need your cheerleaders. These are the people who love and support you, who believe in you when sometimes you start to doubt yourself.

Some people may be able to support you for some things but not others. We each have our strengths and so one person may not be able to be all the things you need. That’s why you need a team of people to support you. Keep this in mind when asking people for help particularly when they say no.

Support is also about support mechanisms, which can be a favourite quote or picture which inspires you, an alarm to remind you to do something or something else. You can read more about that here.

 

Matrix of people's capability and willingness to help picture

When asking people for support, consider their capability and willingness to help.

 

3. Be gently persistent with your New Year’s resolutions

 

This one is particularly important. Our dreams often don’t happen overnight. You build and manifest them over time. The emphasis here is on you. You will make this happen, no one else is going to do it for you. So be gently persistent. Persistent in your intention, focus and action, gentle with yourself, and pace your goals.

Being gently persistent is also about discipline, which is so important to making your new year’s resolutions happen. It’s about keeping doing what you want to be doing. I wrote about this in more detail last year and the year before, so definitely give them a read as the ideas are helpful.

Here are another two other hints regarding discipline.

We often self-sabotage ourselves. You know yourself best so give some thought as to what can derail you – what you do to yourself and what others may do – and develop a plan for addressing it if it happens.

Self-sabotage often stops us implementing our New Year’s resolutions. So have a think about how you get in your own way and develop a plan for dealing with it if it happens #NewYearsResolutions #wellness #makeyourdreamshappen tell a friend

 

For example, when I see bad weather I think I don’t need to go walking. So I take a break! But that doesn’t help me achieve my physical wellness goals. What I could be doing instead is getting on the exercise bike in the warmth of my house.

Wanting things to be perfect can also get in the way. Screw perfectionism. What I found helpful in this regard is thinking that everything is iterative, i.e. in draft form. So just do it and put it out there. Learn from it and take that learning into account when you have another go.

 

Be disciplined by being gently persistent picture

How to be disciplined with yourself to achieve your dreams.

 

I’m sure there is a whole host of other things which can support you to achieve your New Year’s resolutions. But you know what, this is a good enough start.

 

What’s it like for you?

 

What else do you think can contribute to not following through on a new year’s resolutions? And what do you find helps you keep to them? Share your thoughts in the comments below.

If you are living with a chronic illness or the after effects of a serious illness, or are caring for someone who is and would like support to turn your new year’s resolutions for 2018 into reality, have a look at how we can work together and get in touch for a free no obligation consultation.

 

Help with research on acceptance

 

If you or a loved one experienced a serious health issue in the past 2 years and are struggling or wondering if you can accept what has happened, I would love to speak with you. I am researching the concept of ‘acceptance’ within the context of a serious health issue by collecting people’s experiences with it. Click here to find out more. And in exchange, I offer you a free 1 hour coaching session.

 

Pass it forward

 

Although this blog is written in the context of living with a serious health issue, the ideas contained within are applicable to everyone. If you think someone you know would benefit from reading this blog, or you just want to spread the ideas, click on the icons to share.

© Copyright Barbara Babcock 2018

 

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