Support for carers, friends and family – Blog archive
Support for carers of people living with chronic illness or another challenging health issue
You are also impacted by the health issue your loved one, child, parent, relative or good friend has. You have needs too and they are important. These blogs act as support for carers – or supporters if you prefer that term – to help you look after yourself and provide helpful hints, techniques and advice on how to care effectively.
Why you need a fuck it list this year
I’m going to make the case for why you need a fuck it list this year and how to create one. You probably have a bucket list for all the fun things you want to do in life before you die. The bucket and fuck it lists go hand-in-hand. One is what you want to do. The...
How to have a life purpose when living with chronic illness
Is it possible to have a life purpose when living with chronic illness or a serious injury? Or being a carer? You may think it’s no longer possible. A pipe dream. And that can feel devastating. Lonely too. Especially when you look at people around you getting on with...
When you get left behind in life due to your illness
It’s not uncommon to feel you get left behind in life due to your illness or injury or caring responsibilities. It can happen in variety of ways. It may be that you’re still at an earlier level in your career as compared to peers. That can happen when you have to...
How to recover from the coronavirus illness
We may be past the peak of COVID-19 with lockdown just starting to ease, but now there’s the question of how to recover from coronavirus. I can speak on this from a number of perspectives, but for now, I want to focus on those of you who have had the virus....
How to feel more in control
Many people want to feel more in control during these uncertain times. I’m hearing from people who talk about feeling-out-sorts or are waking up in the middle of the night and can’t get back to sleep. And the anxiety feels like just one more thing to overcome. Others...
What is your relationship with uncertainty like?
Considering what your relationship with uncertainty is like has probably not featured as something to think about. Unless of course you’ve had to deal with a challenging health issue, whether your own or someone else’s. Or another significant life event that brought a...
How to manage stress and anxiety
We’re not often taught in life how to manage stress and anxiety. Yet it’s something many of us deal with on a day-to-day basis. At times it can feel like it gets into the driving seat of one or more parts of your life. It’s understandable, life happens like that....
How to survive lockdown: Advice from people with chronic illness
Learning how to survive lockdown is something we are all doing right now. Right around the world. Based on my experience working as a coach supporting people living with challenging chronic illnesses, I think they have a lot to teach us on how to do that. Because many...
Feeling out-of-sorts during lockdown? This is why
You may be wondering why you’re feeling out-of-sorts during lockdown. In the past few weeks you may have been feeling lethargic, sleeping a lot, or not enough. Maybe you feel really down and sad about everything or your anxiety feels a lot higher. You’re not your...
How to fall in love with yourself after illness
Learning how to fall in love with yourself after illness or injury felt like the most appropriate topic to write about given Valentine’s Day is this week. We see so much about being in a couple at this time of year, but how are we in being with ourselves? And what...
How to contribute to your health in a healthy way
A challenging health issue is often a wake-up call to contribute to your health more mindfully and consistently. And there are many things you can do to contribute to your health. In fact, if you read a lot of the health and wellbeing articles in the press, you...
What is the danger in the pursuit of health?
How can there be a danger in the pursuit of health? Sometimes I wonder if it has become a bit like: “Here’s what you’ve been waiting for! Do X, Y and Z and you will be healthy!” A magical formula that gives quick results. The pursuit of health is a great and...
Three things that will make your new years resolutions successful
You can make your new years resolutions successful by doing three easy things. If you set resolutions now or at another time of the year, chances are you want to succeed at achieving them. Yet sometimes things get in the way which means you don’t, despite well-meaning...
How to change your snacking habit for the better
You’ve tried to change your snacking habit and you may have made improvements at times, but they don’t seem to have lasted for very long. You end up dissatisfied and maybe even angry with yourself. After all, you’re on a quest to improve your health because you’re...
How to deal with your life now versus how it should be
Figuring out how to deal with your life now versus how it should be can be hard. Frustrating. Sad. Something has happened to you and your life that wasn’t in the plan. And it means that the life you had planned for yourself – your life how it should be - may no longer...
How to have a growth mindset after illness
You may feel that learning how to have a growth mindset after an illness or injury sounds like a hippy fad, or a luxury reserved for people who don’t have challenging health issues, or it’s just not a priority as you’re trying to figure out how to live in a changed...
Why a growth mindset is important after illness
Having a growth mindset is important after illness or injury. I feel it is key to crafting a life worth living when you are dealing with a challenging health issue whether your own or a loved one’s. It’s a way of believing, thinking, doing, and feeling and is based on...
What is grief in the context of your illness and life?
What is grief in the context of your illness or injury? Should you be grieving for what you’ve lost as a result of it? Well that depends. Every person is different. Every person will have different beliefs about grief. And everyone grieves differently. So you will all...
The best advice on how to stop carrying other people’s shit
Are you aware of when you’re carrying other people’s shit? And do you know how to let it go? These are important questions. Because when you or a loved one are living with a challenging health issue, the last thing you need is carrying other people’s shit around. That...
Why is accepting help good for you?
You may be of the opinion that accepting help is not a good thing to do. Because you may feel guilty for feeling like a burden to someone. Or you feel bad or even ashamed because you now need help. Maybe you’re afraid of being seen as needy. Or worried that people...
Why it’s so easy to give up and how not to
It’s so easy to give up when something feels really hard going. You try something to improve your health, make something good happen and it doesn’t seem to work. So you want to throw in the towel, i.e. give up. This has happened to all of us at some point. But you...
How to make your search for the new you after illness easier
The search for the new you after you experience a serious illness or injury and are living with the ongoing impact can feel so very hard. In some ways, you know you are still the person you were before. But in other ways, you’re not and you don’t recognise yourself....
How to deal with losing your independence after illness
Figuring out how to deal with losing your independence after a serious illness or injury can feel like a really hard task to do. When a serious illness or injury strikes, people often say they lose ‘all semblance of me’. That is partly, and sometimes a big part,...
How to know if you are wasting your precious energy
Do you feel like you’re wasting your precious energy? You’re living with a serious health issue or a loved one is so you have that to deal with. And life continues to happen, throwing curve balls your way. You’re trying to deal with it all and feeling pretty stressed...
How to manage your health issue successfully
Learning how to manage your health issue successfully (or well enough) can sometimes feel like a full-time job. You have a lot to learn about your health issue, how people tend to be affected, what treatments there are, is there a cure, what non-medical treatments can...
How to set strong goals for your rehabilitation plan
It’s important to set strong goals for your rehabilitation plan to help you in your ongoing recovery from a challenging health issue. Strong goals are the foundation of your plan. They provide a destination to work towards and even the direction to take. They become...
Here is what you need to focus on when creating a rehabilitation plan
Creating a rehabilitation plan to manage your recovery from a serious illness, injury, relapse or exacerbation of symptoms is doing what you can to take control and positively influence your outcomes. Sometimes on this journey you can feel at a loss on what to do and...
Here are the 10 principles of a good rehabilitation plan
Having a rehabilitation plan for recovery and managing the illness or injury sometimes feels like an afterthought in the treatment and care of people with serious health issues. Unfortunately, I often hear of people being discharged without any information other than...
When is being defined by your disability a good thing?
When is being defined by your disability a good thing? Is it a good thing to be defined by your disability? Or not? You may have a disability and think, ’Yes, I have a disability.’ But you may not consider yourself disabled. I’ve been discussing these questions...
How to cope with a setback in recovery
The realisation that you have to cope with a setback in recovery can be very disappointing. Especially if you have been doing what you need to be doing to recover well. It’s another piece of bad news. Someone recently asked me for resources on how you cope with a...